Moving Forward in the Spiritual Life

00:00
00:00
Audio loading...

Welcome! You can log in or create an account to save favorites, edit keywords, transcripts, and more.

Serial: 
NC-00256
Description: 

Archival Photo,

"It This All There is? Spirituality for the Long Haul", "Moving Forward in the Spiritual Life"

Photos: 
Notes: 

#item-set-062

Auto-Generated Transcript

okay well i think we'll get started it's great that so many of you can actually be here for the first session after sometimes hard for people to get here by seven thirty on friday night depending on when they're coming from self thanks to all of you for making that special effort
to be here
so the title of this
isn't there a song to uk those man authors to settle there is
but what triggered this for us was a attraction up shirt was at the new yorker were there are two months sitting next to each other and meditation and
one is answering the other one and the answer is this is if there isn't anything else so it's like the month of said well what else is so precise just sitting here in texas there isn't an unexpected it
so that was
something that got my attention and pollen i talked and at because i start with the truth there's there's an infinitely greater ah
that happens for people are engaged in the spiritual journey over time and and so that's what we wanted to try and focus on today
the many retreats
are you decide to know like an introduction to prayer introduction to lectio so we don't really want us to be in an introduction per se but instead we want to focus on what happens when one continues on this path and has been on the
his path for some period of time and we want to look at it
within them a monastic context because the context for both of us
i'm a month paula is a long standing up late of hours and
so we thought that together that we might explore with all of you and
what it might mean to as we continue this what it's been like for us what our various experiences have been shelf that'll be the case for the two of us and and mangano involve you in this whole process as well so what it is
isn't is that there are some secret knowledge that once someone's been following this life for a period of time that there's some secret said that we're here to hand over a secrets to
that's the second workshop after this
but one of the things that comes and i'm perfect you all know this from your your own spiritual practices and is that
as we continue with it that there's a way of when should get simpler for us on the one hand and then
more intimately complex on the other and we want to be exploring at seeming paradox of yet he was well so this is gonna be very much a discussion based retrieved time
we have we actually have a few answers so
after some years of doing this we we have seen some specific things to offer but then again so will you have some answers and that just to you as you have questions we have questions and so this fall ever tree despite being very much of a sharing among all of us over this period a week
can we actually put in an additional sessions so that we have enough time to do all this normally we have four sessions one on friday to on saturday and one on sunday we put an extra one end so that we can make sure that
people have an opportunity to share with each other and to engage with us around the issues that are important for all of you so ah
i'm beat healy i've been among here for about eighteen years and prior to that i was a monkey in a monastery in kansas for fifteen years so last year i celebrated thirty years of vows and sixty years
age and down
and so the great thing for me was that at that point i have spent more than half my life as a monk and so that you know that's it for me that at a certain kind of gravitas about it
a twenty fifth anniversary you know that was some years earlier but the thing that grabbed me then and still continues to grab me that over half my life as a mom so that's i'm still trying to figure out what that means but it's continued to be an important for me
so currently i am the treasure here and my background has nothing to do with finance and by a training a clinical psychologist and i worked at the menninger clinic for quite a few years and i was the director of religion and psychiatry
there so i was interested and happened from the very earliest time on the intersection of psychology and spirituality
and i took
do spiritual direction and clean toilets you know just like all of you there's any tasks that have to be done in small communities and we all engage in knows i also spent time in prayer and reflection on sometimes i think i don't have enough time for that at so it goes
i was attracted to the monastic life because i didn't know much about my my training was was ended up choosing dominican sisters for grade school and high school wonderful and from the midwest but it was women from ah and in a small order called the sisters of loretto
there actually was a cave
get seventy some of the first property and get some and he got started or thomas merton as from the these were what kind of push me over the edge where these women who were you know professionals but also committed devoted religious so that's what pushed me over the edge and
they suggest you know you might find the benedictines you appealing to you and i did and i have and i continue to do that so what was it that attracted me well it was the common live the life together and also the the life of a liturgical prayer which is large
partly of the benedict and approach
and like oh and then if you look at the sappy and show
such financial and
cause the last that's proper for you
our prior has been talking with us and giving us the series of talks and he didn't you know he he had a triangle so and the triangle quotes a sudden three of these things includes liturgy is includes the desert fathers and mothers and the earliest forebears those
people with first few hundred years right after the time of christ and that it also includes scripture so what robert has added are the role of the medieval and modern writers so if you'll have an exposure to all of that this weekend
we pray turn sharply you have time for black seal we will be talking about the desert fathers in particular because that's a further one moves and the spiritual life that earlier back seems that you go to the to the original sources and find great
solace there and then finally we have a wider a modern rider with us so let me turn it over to you for your introduction well it's wonderful to see every kind of here and i the i know it as an of before me because i recognize and faces maybe from the a so
wembley say anymore and they simply and come in and going through the years here at nuke mockery that i'm calling houston and i first began coming here probably at the very early nineties and was brought here in the first time by janet hussein in that bench and shaved and coming here
forever since you as an early twenties i think right in and salah the first time i ever came up i was just very recently back to safe and had raised in the lizard tradition than real serious lutheran can and
eminent in a late teens which was the height of his sixties like a lot of my contemporaries i left the faith i had all kinds of good reasons i thought and they stayed away for nearly twenty years so the first time it came here in the early nineties i had just barely started to open the
your vaca to face so heck in a huge impact on me to come here the first time and especially coming from a protestant background you know and and never really even been close to a priest before much less monks in athens
various started it to be here is and
i have a i was married at nineteen the first time married for thirteen years went through divorce that was all during that era linux very far away from keenum church and faith and everything and just kind of had one of those tumultuous sixty styles of as
after maths i guess i would call it and then that remarried and had two stepdaughters two kids in my own now have four little grand kids and such very busy busy life we live on four acres done in the rio grande day and you know raise lots of different things like
columns and veggies and we have beehives and chickens in the whole thing so that's a kind of benedictine life which we didn't really plan that way we started off on that before a even came to the hermitage we've been there almost thirty years now been married almost thirty years and
and taught for number of years at cal poly the english department
and then quit at fifty and i did that primarily because if you guys
can there was a very draw the you know just a very powerful deep draft to the quieter and more contemplative like that was very very blessed to have the ability to tap my husband ten years older than me and he had just retired after thirty some years in high school teach him so he said live my pinch
and see what happens in our cans have you know by then launched into the world so it's possible to do this and
i tell you that was a just a really blessed time to have it was about five years before the kids started getting married and having babies and our parents got to the point where they were really needing to let and help we had this little zone in there were i think it was very important part of my
spiritual light
recently about three years and guy was invited to begin teaching again this time it's in a master of fine arts in creative writing program so i have five grad students a year and just mentioned them you know through the first year the program and send them on to the mentor for the second year
and can coming back to teaching after this period of is being home and ragging only writing i'm trying to practice as much as i could have what i had learned here
i became a novel a to think in nineteen ninety nine that right ten we we didn't at the same time so one of us should remember that station
yes it's going on fifteen years now i've paid enough money and about twenty plus years of coming here so and i haven't feeling some of you have been coming longer than me you know
and i'm very curious myself way you would choose a workshop with a name like this is that all there is an addition be an interesting group of people who show up mix well and so we thought we do just to start off and and trying to make it quite brief because there's to
plenty of time to share your whole story this weekend that's can be part of the whole thing but if you had just may be in a sentence to say why did you come to this or why don't you decide to come do this tree is wanna start with and love you here talented at times your major yeah just tell us your first name
and legends when they added and capital rome been coming here this is about the same time name's younger than himself and i mostly came here because he disappeared random read my dissertation for me and
and then just like carousel out of his voice payment
and i have enough however some updates since you've written and i thought it look like of the college and frank i can always use little spiritual on the in them
so that was another month to thank you yeah those that the is need to go back to the well as a derek from sometimes yeah
what you a jaffa good for from lower back to your location and tracking soothing really were the sub title which was a screwdriver the last or from for the law and that is destroying the just
cause i'm considering yeah i know she turned to or much as application
this is really an important question that a lot of great discoveries but just because to
the with the that atlas for a really long time to focus on you're really on not so so
that's good
i guess so i came for
curious
a piece of the diocese of a by better sense of such a about oh wow
probably something that the similar experience or maybe not as dramatic and miners finding this is is here
i was didn't make you
i asked my vision to give me a chance to recover myself here
cruiser
the works
in closer to obscure reasons i came this one because well halloween
the north american college ah the nineties by monsignor from boston was about creating these off
animated supreme on topic
he regularly it once you in advance
nozzle fabrics community my classmates that we had more efficiency was a when he was talking about in madison chicago
but i just got to since it was such a humble
the sounds very interesting
it'll be interesting i bet a front loading so i know who beads but when i saw the biggest it
this is called
ah know anything so i thought she must be somebody
hey very good stereotypes
it's
well as
is good
yeah and you will at that moment and i'm a little bit and also prevent these that's now i have asked the wind to come up here are like least seven years so when and shots that here is why are you kidding me i i've been wanting to them
so and it was really special to date this action on the planet in a way and was one of the first books and cigarette and i started my husband and
and it meant a lot and i just got their most recent self i am super excited to hear used to be in an officer to change your pumpkin sound engine
ah my name is michelle email
of
i don't know that i check you are
that's a it isn't and effective and even know it was called yeah
pictures and wanted to into iraq the spiritual maturity continue lasting impact
and when i looked at it last week goes like this is this entire case is perfect for are having a discussion work like is this a like this our lives and keep a boy you know will get the computer and doing the same thing is it in
was a this is perfect so really grateful
means to me
i'm thrilled to be here i am
in you'll be a new cannot the eyes came for the first time and obvious this is my third time
now
many years practice kind of on the outside contemplative practice of very close friend was an open tears know
so it certainly a to college together she's been wracking time getting here or in the here is going back to the out and follow my husband that us in worship center who would com electric and you brought home
some of the legend says that i have friends
put on this saddle it was attracted to that eat also i heard about you in the background
psychology in memphis so just a lot of different pieces
really long as i almost salt and pepper let's here in britain
excellent
my dave
whispers
seventeen years yes so years and education very catholic church and forty four years retired from competitive bidding office job the permission office for forty years just last year and it's title at all day
in the church i guess my problem
but this time it just seems weren't perfect that is part of my life because it's like a i i passed through that whole work stage i don't feel much different than i did thirty years ago
and so i'm retired i'm going a catholic feel good at my scan about that but i also have found that model waiting for the six or seven years i've been coming here have always brought me back from situations that
i can help with
and i'll feel like now that i feel like i couldn't roll or and and he wrote sometimes you can one one or two on
since bismarck smart i was looking for the secret sauce
the way
i was a great ball purpose when i first came i also telegraph all anyway i was just to and and shop for years and national got me through and it was address anything
one of us can be won get we come here and we know you belong here oh yeah
and i felt that somebody planted a bug gone through so much conscious once and then to can be a number is reflection time work retreats always enjoy your eyes after
a perfect i'm i'm just know the comfortable investigation well you know this notion of feeling at home and being at home and have that become a stronger signal for time i think is is is a key element
we've heard that was true i mean i transferred here i was at another monastery so it's not it's a very rare thing to transfer amongst just don't bomb on and gita but i did and
so that's often an experienced people have this there's something that feels like home about this and so that is one of the things we'll explore what it means to be at home and how we become more at home
and nice i have an area and i asked by this place and six years but never stopped
tell how they may choose i'm not sure and
our is
has hired this guy out this is why i'm often find that
parking on technical project in me center the and how about from that a spiritual journey and industry for a while they both everything that are more as
i dislike
hi i'm yearning and realize that this melia
and so when i saw your name here but i had this big features site yet
man is a good
incorrect every and just saying live you can be my head i wasn't sure about loosely money for it and either a is and on
i want it now i will try out for i'm aware recent where can i need to have years for
i know there's a lot of more
two villages and he did
have you see tree great can agree
the back to
seventy eight and cry my left events place here like home
nice used to come up here and eleven rifles in be be or on
mr burglar proof
meeting with chris and it's my first time year i was and i think so that was in october and issue my masters last paper and was renamed the new york times and this
the how much extra describe an article about the survey right ainda that said i just wanna get out and there were now grounds that com few days later the cancellation and on
yes and i'm just kind of gamy i was raised strict catholic and i have not yet have observed that for a long time that have our cake and take the of the church but he can't take the
haven't done a lab the help like and
thing that is kept that stood so does kind of together led the to local
the name is meal and i'm here because my college freshman roommate actually asked and we limited our schedule so i didn't see between nine thirty nine forty five and tuesday you know that kind of be avoided because we're going to two different worlds and so i'm really pissed
here i think i've been trying to do have retreated fixers sixties when we then and i have ability to practice it's of the intellectual urge discourage brown just all agree to see and change in the jesuit university service the students were and diversity we can say oh sure the and
if if they said testing and tag is very end
but
grow up with them
and man's catherine have been kind of course of the nineteenth my first sort of nasty call those age and and oh should call the a vintage satellite
so i've had this june with and i am
if you know
a lot of huge life changes which i've gotten to that part of it but it is to now what you know what what what is so i was very attracted to that than like it had they can guarantee is itself
no i a factors can have worked factors that i'm having monsters but i don't live animals to get going to also
good
i'm nancy it is the first time here with a seldom orange county and happily married forty years
i grew up air the methodist and i knew from the time of little those who ah pay a couple of experiences in knows are searching for something deeper that would and can get the price and things like my friends were catholic
and converted to catholicism in the late sixties and then i faded away then types are getting living was needed in my heart and then now seventeen years ago found some of realization fellowship with are or lonesome or the nanda and started
practicing the first to each of villa of spiritual yoga and meditation and i found that through the years with that my whole love of christ and christianity just one
just little tortuous lives inside of me i am i felt as conflict would do i go to one side of the other one is it and then it was about to come up here in everything has been put together this the amazing like all my questions have been answered
i was
when the monks had led me to the books of of eighty griffiths and who had lived and it was an international india amazement putting the two together and from reading his books i've been just going oh yes all week
for those oh my goodness all my questions or be if and insert didn't have to anything to last forever
i also heard the series of the a wonderful man and d p m closer to me in oceanside true an extra extra in some of them so i guess i meant here to out for the long haul moshe i learned how to in a in the western okay
so we did break the rules that we did allow one very beginning person to come and i will be mayor
and that my name is mia and the reason why i'm here is they want to find out when it guess all is
have always to the point tomato
but and i've been having years since ninety four and i'm wondering if i'm to beat you by one year think so i came in ninety six so he's seen i came in ninety four with my husband and we both are converts to catholicism you became the kitchen
he can function humidity and he does on for years ago
but maybe calm around
the new commodities
again we we we found me go home before know by our background is similar to nancy's before we catholics we do you long to the self-realization fellowship what you've done under which taught us to maybe change
and and then it is we in here a few i really give a chance to go deeper and education in it's my main goal to find car here is it is with wrote for anyone seeking i hope to find to
ty forty five
and
general and i'm in long beach and being have brought me here are three years ago we've come each year since and the i just love this place because it's an oasis in the desert dirt so tired of over populated areas and news
norway's in come appeared it's so quiet and i'm on the downside the army and five years old and little there isn't a lot of to live can as a church organist for many many many years but as ignoring this i was involved with hearing to do a search
this like protein masses in in feel it up it's really worshipping is i reply but after retirement and i was carried you for many years never found of time and this is a
oh actually my spirituality is what i'm really wanting to were gone and that's why i can ex so help you choose to here today sorry mister saint cecilia a and in the such musician change
i'm sister made
as engines and is my second time here and wish she had brought back to useful and oh my gosh and i didn't ever expect to make me a date to the generosity and another face
hey actually taking know the name of this workshop see in
bring me and said to me i said i might as bad as me
god is full of surprises
so but a simple equation gave the nineties i said just put he
we're glad you're here at a special welcome to those first topics
it's not always easy to get away it's not always easy to get here and and so you have managed to do both so that's really wonderful so to extend the room warm welcome to those who have been here before it's about time you gotta and
and in some ways that she'll be like the one room schoolhouse he has what and when i'm hearing is that everybody is in different places different stages you know that i think this is going to all still be able to gel and and we were saying we don't want to hold them too long to
a night but how about if we start our interview worked ok
let's do it contains to work at a shorter
can view each other a little bit and then put going a hand off the questions to you to think about the and then when you tobacco be courage and you to do that with each other and then we'll mix things up as a goal yeah and of course this is going to have a monastic
umbrella over at we're specifically talking about a monastic way you know because that's where we are as and monastery so big i think you already answered question number land which was at what point in your life were you drawn to monasticism and what were you hoping far when you signed up
sprout so or just a little more about that i was twenty nine were thirty read an introduction when i was twenty nine my miles third my first problems so i was looking for
for community i was looking for a liturgical life even eastern scripture and i was looking for and contemplative life
so in my first monastery i got to idols or three i didn't get it and template i didn't quite know that that's what i was looking for accent
advised by my spiritual director a wonderful done from the in addiction sisters i worked across town she says you know our way of life here in kansas she said it's not a some monastic life but it's not a contemplative of what the benedictines in almost every case with united
dates though especially those who came in the eighteen hundreds that came to meet the pastoral and parochial needs of the immigrants so that they weren't found it to lead a contemplative life they were found it to have schools and take care of parishes and that's what they've done and continue to do and do well so i so i have
two out of the three of
and it was only later that i was able to to get the third part by coming here how'd you know about the contemplative life i mean you're twenty nine years old and it how did you come to and then i'm going off script here to that i didn't really know that's what i want okay you don't you just knew you weren't
if she told us apparently whenever i was talking about this for was not what i was gonna get there and i think that was the point that she was making she says she's not will we do things some of what you want and you'll find year and other things you won't and so and i choose someone that first used to work for okay so sound as and
a new concept for something you have been seeking without really understanding what what i was in eighth grade i
i wrote seven storey mountain the dominicans got a bunch of boys together on a saturday and way we read it talked about that for a night of course it was a vocational say and but i didn't realize it at the time i thought of interest just extra reading stuff that i had the doings can so as i know
a little bit about it but had no personal experience with
oh and how did you find a commodities
well i
an original my undergraduate degrees in biology excited a very scientific mind at the time so i was doing a lot of research i was reading about places and i read about and come on lily that said so this was ban you don't like eighty five not a
he and i thought know which it would be too strange
and i was right to not that the place for strange but it would it would benefit from me at that time
i really needed i think that that the immersion in the community life and back in those days but brother gabriel who swung her i would say one of the founding members of this community that those earliest years there was a just a real emphasis on solid
ooh and that was more than i would have been able to handle that the time
and besides it was california i'm from wisconsin and i had no desire to move up to the land of earthquakes
what turned out and what would you say lose your biggest challenge you've been a stumbling black internally to making him monastic practice worker monastic life work
well i saw
i thought this and various parts of my life that if i just put in the right kind of effort that i can i can make all the pieces fit together when dave who is also a psychologist to show she'll appreciate this it but i was doing some of my training in that area even before my doctor and i i just
i wanted all the pieces to fit in that i said i'll just read voraciously which i did and then it'll all come together and you know i didn't
and it doesn't but dynamics but something is did some things came together so that so for me the
i would say part of a stumbling block is that i thought this was something that i'd be able to myself so like the notion of surrendering to a process or to an experience or to of relationship
i mean i thought that to those were categories that word
i didn't have category experience for those kind of your experiences early on in my life and that only came with with time
teamwork kind of that achievement green boy are very mature very mature driven was there a particular person who helped you see this did you have some kind of a spiritual mentor help to you or what they have helped you find me and understand the i would say a new
amber a number of people did you know personally helping over time with that and then i think in the great desert tradition just the experience of falling down and getting back up again know so you know the stakes are tripping up you know
no it's not a so that really as you all know ever really ends it's sometimes it you know the older we get the harder it is to get up you know both physically as well as
spiritually i have fallen and broke a bone in my foot and this was actually some years ago and ten years ago and now a remember the emergency room she says that the nurse said you know it's harder to fall the older you get
and that phrase has always sort of stuck with me as as a having a richer meaning than just a physiological facts of that that that it is hard sometimes harder to get up again but that's so it it's the multitude of mistakes
it's a family guy i used to make guess i am fairly used to it
after party as i am right
well you know if it's actually a scant it is
two in the line with that yeah i don't find that i beat myself up like i used to you know
i just i just get going again i'm just so used to that one of the monks your peter damian and you will remember shanked he sent me i what he would be up the person reacquainted me with new kemal to lean one i did my transfers you know so it would be because of him actually that i
came i mean here for many years before coming here but he had sent me a little drawing up some monks either got it out who did it himself he was an artist but it was know always we get up again you know worth it which is a
a strong and recurrent theme in the in the desert tradition and i i think that's true so even though it's it's harder it's the find down getting up
after eight years thirty years through a monastic practice do you see any evidence in yourself of transformation per annum personal loan and what is it and how are you able to recognize him
so there was a an elderly sister and anxious and that's where my other monastery was and she was a wonderful spiritual director she described herself as a great a lauer and i i remember when she first said that i thought well that's a stupid thing
that's what are you allowing people to do you know you know what they're doing you know that's not going to work why don't you just tell them that i never said it to or think before but i do have
i probably should have actually she can correct any earlier than the i'll tell you something but ah
that make no sense to me but you know it makes tremendous sense to me now to you the chance of of allowing that the the the spiritual life is one of relationship and experience and and engagement and it isn't a matter of
a walk when i was when i first i love to me that since detriment of the obsessive pardon me
i used to love to make schedules you know and then i would get up at this time and then i would have this time for lexia and then i would go for a walk you know kidding so maybe i don't go for a while and
but i and i still have and drawn towards that sometimes as though having a schedule and following these external things there's going to save me but i mean and the external things do save me because one of the things that i've discovered in myself visit
like i couldn't do this without the support of my brothers i would be i know i'll say the word but i don't really mean it this by i'd be a failure i don't really mean be a failure but it just wouldn't work i just know that i need you know the so support and and sustenance
since and structure that the monastic life when my brothers and sisters you know that the larger chemical it's community gives me i'd be lost without a just just lost so does that answer sung and how does that
have there been any and points along the way when you felt like you had broken through somehow in your relationship with god what are you just going along for ten years or twelve years or whatever and then something major shifted
no it's always been a manner a very small things and so for me i know i can't say this i had this experience no i haven't i've had lots and lots of little experiences and in some of those have had a profound impact on me
ist here's why
no one of the months here was driving me crazy you know so it so we're we're no different than anyone else such as far as i'm so he was just driving me crazy and i just have i was standing right outside our door and i just happened to see him just walking along
so i don't want to say didn't drive me crazy anymore okay because he still drove me crazy but something shifted in the way that i mean didn't bomb he didn't bother me as much as he used to and you know and it wasn't anything that i haven't been as sorry i haven't been trying to get over this
i just had so that so what what i say i would say that that was an experience was a great moment so you know there was some sort of i look at it you know something changed at me and my sense of him and then ultimately other people too so that was you know of the lord but
it started a not a big thing but it's that's just one example of many many small things so young dancers not have converged on interesting and how's your original vision and what monasticism was going to be changed in these
thirty years oh well
after learning what the word contemplative meant right so
you know i'm here i am treasurer
which is not something that i actually enjoyed doing but we don't tend to get too many m b a's and
i asked my life
so i think i'll do this till i die probably
but i guess what i've what i've come to understand is that there's a certain way of being in it doesn't much matter what the tasks are
in that you know the italians always say this phrase you know where an italian base community from from italy is only is less than ninety of us in the world come on the least amount of as couple hundred women huge numbers and as
africa shortly in a fair yesterday was a day of and of
celebrating a contemplative life in the church it's always the twenty first of november and the pope went to our monastery of women in commodity and and wrong and prayed there with them and tissue so
why was all talking about i don't know
this one eighty nine your original vision all the change strike if it had so know
there's a sense of of engaging in a flow of the life so that
contemplative
experiences permeate the day and the life
and are not just limited to what might be considered classic contemplative practices
but that's not much different from other religious traditions to you know
in the buddhist tradition and you know suzanne as dot meditation and you know as and there's a way of life you know so so i would say it's it's similar to them
and finally let let you say to someone his chest starting address kind of monastic way of spirituality whether they're in a modest becoming a monk or becoming a friend of the monastery or and operators and people were debt
well
it's a grand adventure you know it or is it certainly has its
difficult moments but that's no different than than anyone else like know there's a what i have found over time is it did to spend a greater depth of experience on
a greater
self acceptance less of have a need to perform on
you know i still make up less that i hoped and all accomplish but
i have less i have less trusted those
is this and and for if anything it's a warning signs that some that something's gone wrong if i have to start making lists
so i would say it a it's led me to have a much greater self acceptance on
and surprising that i'm much for of at a lower now than ever
and i was back then you know our past comes to haunt us you know
i visit a friend and of every number of years if it if i'm doing a workshop of cincinnati and interested when recently and and we go back many years and he always reminds me of things that i said to him that i just wish i had
you know so that's actually kind of a good check for me to and i said if you remember when you sent this to me and then i have to admit that i do remember
and then i i am sometimes just appalled that i would have said something like that
so
progress means becoming appalled sometimes and i'm having some some joy in the changes that take place
thank you what was it good energy and years post do this to me for me but i think that maybe we should wait till them learn don't you sang yeah let you are to them yeah about that for an idea so we could just meet back here and i'll pass out those questions that for you
if the lights well yeah because our our interview tomorrow beginning and then you left your brave game to some pairs to sort of thing a few each other a little bit so this way you can
give your added
on the question that you'll be asked around so they asked are now
sam

so tomorrow tomorrow morning we don't have videos did jesus ah so that
twice a month lately don't have vigils on saturday so the first offices at seven o'clock said a five thirty so
so
and you should feel free to to come to office and mass as you would like and if if if you don't want to and affirmative you know have more solitude or whatever that's perfectly fine
you you do on a mecca and attempt if you didn't get a chance to see it tonight to pay attention to the sunset tomorrow
this time of year here it's just spectacular
i remember when i first saw a painting by arthur one of our monks with red sky listen to
so he made that up
but not he didn't guy made that so spectacular and so you know used to use the time and we don't have of you know probably not going to go over it's and forty five minutes usually at a time so you'll have time for rest and and reflection we won't be meeting tomorrow night in our lab
but it's at five hundred for kind of plaque as the last four to five okay i said before just our masters to for best visual have that evening three can and women women in the morning on sunday then you'll all join us join them monastic community for lunch that day
okay do our flashlights because you'll need them to get to work
and just hoping that you'll have the able to have a real retrieve in the midst of a retreat you know sometimes you increase can get so busy and packed and you're taking not so fast you can't just be in place that you come in a that's kind of what we're hoping for
this is more of a process that yeah doesn't just actor ray
okay thank you